- Rabin Tuladhar

Come the month of Magh, we start hearing those ear-shattering sounds of band baja everywhere in the streets of Kathmandu. Back home, as winter comes we get busy buying wedding gifts and attending wedding parties. When I was a kid, marriage was nothing more for me than a Janti and an elaborate party that follows. I somehow enjoyed the Janti procession and the party was always my favorite. But now, being away from home for some time, I have been missing all the nitty-gritty of Nepali weddings. And my ears have almost forgotten the melody of band bajas. But this winter, it was different; thousands of miles away from home, I was busy attending wedding parties. Everybody around me was knotting their nuptial knots.

These lucky ones took few weeks off from daily humdrum and flew to Nepal to tie their knots. “Khane mukh lai junga le chhekdaina”. The Nepal bandhas and political turmoil didn’t shake their determination and couldn’t deter them from getting married. And in matter of weeks, they were already back, proudly showing off their shiny wedding rings and wedding DVDs. Well, the brides and grooms were also generous to throw the second round of party to us poor souls waiting eagerly with our teeth sharpened. Besides the prospect of culinary delight, how these newly wed couples met is what intrigued me the most.

Our society is neither as modern as western societies nor as conservative compared to the last decade. Things are different now. With increasing number of would-be brides and grooms studying or working abroad, things – especially in a matrimonial front - have become more complicated. Good old ladies who used to be lamis are outmoded these days. Pseudo-arrange marriages have become more popular. The matrimonial candidates are educated enough to want to know the inside out of a person with whom they are going to spend the rest of their lives. But being far away from home, it has become difficult for young hearts abroad to find their soul mates back home. Nevertheless, Internet chat has proved very handy for these potential candidates. Add a web cam and a microphone, and you won’t need a lami anymore. One of my friends got tied up to a girl whom he never met, except virtually in Yahoo messenger. With their web cams on full swing, they said they never felt the need of meeting each other in person. For another couple, even though they did meet a couple of times, it was through MSN that their love really flourished. Living oceans apart, they had no other way to stay in touch except through friendly MSN messenger. They were also among the lucky ones to tie their knots this year. And there is yet another Romeo, whose dreams wouldn’t have materialized had it not been for MSN. I still distinctly remember him excusing himself from our gathering for “the next day’s presentation”, only to tacitly get online to chat with his beloved. They have also bitten the dust this winter. Kudos to MSN and Yahoo messengers, they have done wonders!

Well, things aren’t always as easy though. One particular friend of mine, who is stuck chatting with three guys, always laments, “Boy, it is difficult to know one through chatting”. She says she is fed up of chatting and is going to fly to Kathmandu to meet these chat heroes to find if they are really up to what they boast to be.

Well, good luck to her on her endeavor and congratulations to the newly married couples - wish you a happy married life ahead; and for you singles: don’t worry, every dog has its day. So far as I am concerned, I am off to buy one of those ubiquitous web-cams for myself.